healing


I have a new favorite christian band … Tenth Avenue North… I have listened to both of their albums and have yet to hear a song that I don’t like or more important one that doesn’t speak to me!  It’s not often I even like Contemporary  Christian Music.. I’m more of a black gospel kind of person.. =)  However I have XM Radio and I’ve really only listened to 33 and 34 before .. Southern Gospel and Black Gospel.. Kind of opposite ends of the spectrum there.. hah!  Then one day they both were playing HORRIBLE stuff, so I tuned in to XM 32 and I have to say I was very pleasantly surprised!!! WAY better then K-LOVE – which has been the extent of my contemporary music experience – and I wasn’t impressed.  However getting back to XM32 – I heard some of these in about a 2-3 hour period..

Love Is Here –  Tenth Avenue North
For Those Who Wait – Firefly
Lead Me – Sanctus Real
Healing Begins – Tenth Avenue North
Your Love Sets Me Free – The Advice
Beautiful, Beautiful – Francesca Battistelli
Blink – Revive
Get Back Up – TobyMac
Forgiven – Sanctus Real

Needless to say .. Sanctus Real, The Advice, and Tenth Avenue North are officially my new favorite groups… The ones posted are just the ones that really stuck with me!  I love the words to Forgiven by Sanctus Real ” In this life I know what I’ve been, but here in your arms I know what I am” !  Amazing words, amazing music.. A really good song -I’m a treasure in the arms of Christ!  I don’t have to carry the weight of what I’ve done, because I’m Forgiven!

Love is Here – by tenth avenue north … All the words speak to me … but especially “Love is near, it satisfies, streams of mercy flowing from his side” !!! WOW!!! You can’t really get more REAL than THAT!!!

Anyways I”m not going to go through all of these songs, but if your looking for something to put on your Ipod or MP3 player .. I would recommend the above mentioned songs – and even the whole albums of Sanctus Real and Tenth Avenue North – You won’t regret it!

Today we had our annual foot washing and communion service. It was one of the most memorable communion services I can remember.  The church has been “preparing” to take communion for several weeks. Dad has been teaching on the necessity of  communion and foot washing. Especially foot washing. I mean, who doesn’t like taking communion???? I know it’s a gruesome thought.. The blood and the body. But the wonderful feeling that comes over you as soon as you take it is incomparable. But FOOTWASHING!!!!  Has never been my favorite. However I’ve been listening these last few weeks about the importance of it. And even though I’ve been born and raised in Pentecost. I still learned so much.  Today dad preached on Pure Focus on Jesus. How communion is 100 % about Christ. We will never be worthy, never be good enough, never have reached a place where we don’t need communion.  I have to pause for a moment and say. My daddy is the best preacher in the world!!!! I have NEVER in my 24 years been bored. Not on wednesday nights, Sunday nights, even when we were evangelizing!!! Now I could probably quote a few of his sermons… lol. Some of his “favorites”. But I am so glad I’ve never been bored!  Anyways.  I’ve taken communion for as long as I can remember and I’ve always felt the Holy Ghost afterwards, but today it was different somehow. I totally focused on Jesus. I refused to think about how I’ll never be good enough and if I “missed” a sin to repent about and it was AWESOME!!!!! For a brief minute or so it was just Him and me. The rest of the church ceased to exist.  There is no feeling like that!!! I felt clean, renewed, refreshed. I literally felt energy run through my body. It was amazing. So then after we were done with that we separated the men and the women and had foot washing. It was so precious. I know that the Bible says if we don’t partake of foot washing then we have no part of the Father. Thats paraphrasing. So these past few weeks I’ve been praying, God PLEEEEEAAAAASSSEEE  help me learn to LIKE foot washing. Lol. I’m not entirely sure that THAT prayer got answered. BUT. I also prayed for God to lead me. I know I used to in Texas make little groups and not stray outside of my little group year after year after year. lol. Who didn’t??? But this year it wasn’t like that. I washed this newer young ladies feet. She is a sweet young girl and on my part I feel that I had pre judged her before ever getting to know her!!!  Which I HATE when people do to me!!!! So I was standing there and all the sudden it was like God said Go and wash her feet!!! I was SOOOO scared!! As much as I had prayed and asked God to guide me, when He did I was scared!!!  Finally I gave in, and I asked for her forgiveness for any wrong doing on my part, if I had mistreated her, etc… And no at first it wasn’t easy, but it was SO worth it!!!! There was such a sweet spirit.  She had not sensed this, but it still made me feel better. =)  After we were done with that everyone went back to the sanctuary and it was “open mike” for anyone who wanted to speak. It was almost like a family gathering!! I felt like the church was bonding! How can you not feel that way after such a service. As for my title… I know some churches don’t honor this anymore. It’s too hard, too much work, too difficult, too uncomfortable, etc…  I was thinking about this today. How SAD!!!!! I feel sorry for the people that have just let this slide out the back door!!! There is such a blessing in taking communion and foot washing.  I know it’s not the most comfortable feeling in the world… believe me I’m ticklish!!! But I wouldn’t trade it for the world. There are some traditions that I’m very glad we still hold on too!!  I was watching a group of about 5 or 6 young girls.  I mean like 7 and 8 years old. Of course they don’t understand all there is to know about foot washing but they were practicing today!! It was precious! At one point they all went over to my mom and asked if they could wash her feet. And it probably was fun to them but I was BAWLING and it wasn’t even happening to me!!! I know I’m kinda on a soapbox here… but there are some things I refuse to let go of!  I would not trade today for anything.  I got all teary eyes thinking wow that could be my little girl one day.  What a blessing.

Speaking of children… Kung Pow Kitty is growing SO fast!! I want her to stop growing!  My father wants little munchkins… Thats his words.  LOL. I have to admit, I’ve been thinking about children lately. BUT I’m not ready yet!!! Matthews more ready than I am !!! lol. We have switched positions!!  After church today I took mom, dad, and Than to go see our “new place”!!!!!  OOOOOH I can’t wait till we are actually there!! After being in there our apartment feels so small. Lol. And it actually is a very nice apartment. 2 bedrooms 1 bath. A very open floor plan. But still it’s all SO close together. Like the bathroom is within seeing and hearing distance of the kitchen and living room!!!  And is sometimes awkward when we have company. lol. But at the NEW place it’s all the way down the HALL!!! OMWORD I’m GONNA HAVE A HALL!!!!! lol!  The kitchen is so BIG!!! and I have a pantry!!!!! Oh I have died and gone to heaven. Matthews and my bedroom is large enough to have my WHOLE bedset. Sleigh bed, dresser with mirror and 2 night stands in AND out computer etc….  I promise I will put pictures up. Maybe before and after pictures. My mother, who has the most classy taste in decorating is going to help me. I’ve been trying to figure out what my decorating style is … I can’t figure it out!!! I like modern style but with RICH colors! And a little bit of old world style thrown in. I can’t have the whole house look the same. I think I want one room to be animal print. One room totally modern, and one room old world elegance. Hmmm. Do any of you guys know a really good decorating magazine??

Tomorrow I get to start working in Salinas!!! yay! no more trips to Santa Cruz. From Hollister to Santa Cruz it’s like 50 miles which is a longer commute than I would like. But tomorrow I start helping set up the new office. I really believe that God is helping me and also giving me favor with the people I work with.  I absolutely LOVE my job. So far I’ve helped out on several crown deliveries, amalgam, composite, srp, prophy, setting up and breaking down, sterilizing, and I can’t remember what else. I KNOW the steps, but it’s the anticipating the doctors next moves that I’m not quite familiar with yet. However I keep jumping in and asking if I can do this or do that!!! It’s all very exciting. I think my favorite part is taking the X Rays it’s one thing that I am very comfortable with. Boy would my teacher be surprised!!!  I can’t believe how much God is blessing us !!! lol. God gave us this bigger for 125 less apartment, gave me a good paying job, gave Matt a 3 dollar an hour raise, and our landlord said she would give us our deposit back!!!!  God is just too good!!

Thats all folks

Today, right now I should be at church!!!! I am very very very frustrated. But even if I was at church I think I would be more of a distraction than a help. I was fine this morning, but right toward the end of practice I got a real sharp pain in the left side of my abdomen. If any of you have ever had a ovarian cyst burst or rupture you know what I’m talking about.  This was probably the worst that I’ve ever experienced. I can’t tell you the details. But I’m aggravated about it because I really felt like something awesome was going to happen in church today. The chorale has been learning I Need You by Tye Tribbett. It is an incredible song!!! I felt the Holy Ghost all through out practice and I just knew that it was going to really bless the church!!! And now I’m at home because of all this PAIN!!!! I’ve been laying down singing this song to myself! Even though I can’t be at church today the message of that song is still the same!

I can’t breathe without you, and I won’t last with you, I NEED YOU, I NEED YOU!! And I won’t last without, I know that I would fail alone! I NEED YOU, I NEED YOU!!!

Even sitting here at home, in pain and wanting to be at church. I still feel the Holy Ghost! Maybe it’t not fair, but life never is. I don’t know, maybe there’s a lesson in all this somewhere and I just don’t see it.  But I have no one else here with me today, except God. I know I can lean on Him. I actually thank my father for having the foresight to send me home, even though I wanted to stay, for all the wrong reasons too!! I wanted to stay because the choir is supposed to sing that song and I sing the solo part on it. But how selfish am I to think that God can’t move if we don’t sing that exact song?!?!  There are many willing vessels to be used! Not just one! Not just me!! Yes, God does at times use me to minister in song, and there’s nothing as good as that feeling!  I still know that church is going to be awesome! I’ve felt it all day! If God has something for the church today it will get said, get sung, get across in one way or another.

Even though I’m upset about my current situation, I know God is here with me. And He has helped me so much through out this whole ordeal. From the very beginning! I’ve never walked a day without Him being there. And it helps to keep a positive attitude. God has already delivered me from the chains of depression and anxiety, so I know that whether it be through prayer or through modern medicine that this too will get taken care of. And if not, then it’s a part of life that I have to deal with. At least until I have children!!! After children – it’s all gone! yay!!  God is a constant source of strength.  No matter what God is Good! All the time, God is GOOD!

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